Have You Kicked Any “Donkeys” Lately?

In her 1995 national best-selling book, Jesus CEO, Laurie Beth Jones uses the story of Jesus Christ as a metaphor for visionary leadership.  Her book is divided into three sections:

• Strength of Self-Mastery
• Strength of Action
• Strength of Relationships

I read this book a long time ago.  Today, I got an email from one of my managers pointing out a decision I made should have been made differently.  Reading what he said made me feel like “kicking the donkey” and that reminded me of a particular chapter in her book based on one of the stories she used as a leadership metaphor in the “Self-Mastery” section.  It goes something like this:

A man was heading up a road with his donkey.  All of the sudden the donkey stops moving and refuses to move.  The man kicks the donkey to try and get it to move (donkeys are known to be very stubborn). The donkey moves a little more and stops again refusing to move. The man kicks the donkey again…  

To make this short and simpler, it turns out that in the end the donkey was actually trying to let the man know there was possible trouble ahead. It was, after all, looking after his best interest. 

How often do we kick “donkeys” in life?  How often do we refuse to listen, pay attention, and get mad at people who have good intentions and whom may be looking after us, our teams, our companies, etc.?

Any time you hear or read something that makes you “mad”, stop and think before you kick the donkey.  I almost did today and God knows how often I have not realized I had.  We need to learn to explore those things that trigger strong emotional responses in ourselves and others.  If someone else is kicking a donkey, you or someone else, use this metaphor to trigger meaning exploration.

• What did that mean to me or the other person?
• Why am I or why are they reacting this way?
• What is their intention or purpose?
• Do they have my/our best interests at hand?

It takes a lot of presence of mind to be aware that you are about to kick a donkey and to be able to withhold the “kick” from starting or hitting.  It takes practice.  Start by keeping a daily reminder of recalling any possible donkey kicking moments of the day.  Tell the story to your team and ask them to use the term to remind you if you are doing so (kicking a donkey).

Finally, here is some advice for the “donkeys” — Make sure you have a solid rationale and as much factual basis before you refuse to keep moving or pointing potential issues.  Sometimes the kicks we get as donkeys result from our approach rather than the content of our messages.  When you do so, take time to think how to best present the case for caution.

And by the way, independent of personal beliefs, this little book offers a wealth of leadership ideas well worth keeping in mind!  I highly recommend you explore it with an open mind. It is an easy read!  I am amazed at how she was able to extract so much from the story!  AMAZING!!!

The BEST is Yet to Come!

Epi Torres, CEO